Imagine needing to write, produce, direct, and act in your own production of You, the Movie! Sounds a bit intimidating, unless you are one of my career transition candidates who were recently laid off from a well-known, locally based, bankrupt cable company (whose name will not be mentioned) who actually have all of those skills.
This is exactly what is suggested in an unsolicited email ad I received today. Perhaps you’ve seen it. It begins with the tag line “Job Search Guide – Increase Your Chances of Getting an Interview.” Now who among the unemployed does not want to increase his chances of being interviewed for a job? Good lead in. I kept reading.
The email urges job seekers to create their own videos about who they are and what they bring to a hiring company. On some levels, I actually think this is a pretty nifty idea. After all, everybody under 30 has already shared their “special skills” in self-made videos with the entire internet-linked world via UTube. Skills like sliding on their asses down a railing into a not-quite-frozen pond, or wailing about leaving Brittany alone, doing the moonwalk, and of course, eating pasta with your feet. So why not focus on something useful, like earning a living?
The email stated that one must take advantage of the latest recruitment trends to stay at the head of the class. The words latest recruitment trends formed a hyperlink to –what do you think–an interesting article or listing of these trends, right? No, it takes you to a page of “free” magazines that you can get by signing up (read putting yourself on their email and snail mail lists). These include the internationally recognized and acclaimed career enhancement journals such as Reinforced Plastics, Renal Business Today, American Spa, Roads and Bridges, Public Utilities Fortnightly, and the often misunderstood RotorHub, which “provides a fresh overview of the civil and public service rotorcraft world.” I swear to you I did not make these up.
The next hyperlink embedded in the same paragraph refers to your well written resume, which takes you to a new page selling their resume-writing services. I am so jealous that I didn’t think of this. I help people with well-written resumes. Only with me, a little work of your own is involved. OK, a lot of work is required from you. I have to get to know who you are before I can help you draft a smashing resume. Most job candidates themselves don’t know who they are–at least with regard to their actual value. I consider my ability to draw this hidden knowledge from candidates and teach them to recognize and express their strengths a pretty darn good skill. But I digress.
The email then provides you with a nice set of guidelines that you probably wouldn’t have thought of yourself, such as “dress appropriately,” “do a practice run,” and especially “be yourself.” I thought that the idea was to be Brad Pitt.
Should you, nay, can you really create your own video that actually makes you look more like Brad Pitt than Johnny Knoxville, in the recommended 1-3 minutes of running time? Another important question: you know those pesky but ubiquitous and mandatory on-line applications? Have you ever noticed the section that states “upload your personal video here?” Say there is an actual email address to which you can upload your video or a physical location to which a disc can be mailed (careful, don’t confuse it with your Cancun vacation videos). Who is going to see it? It is the H.R. Assistant, the equivalent person who tested your patience at another company when her phone screening techniques included asking three separate times if you had more than five years experience when any dolt who reads can see on your resume that you have over ten years? Oh, wait, reading is not the same as adding.
Towards the end of this highly enlightening advertorial on improving your chances of getting an interview, the email begins to unabashedly sell it’s other revenue-generating service which, for a reasonable fee, distributes your resume to the hundreds, perhaps thousands of recruiters and hiring managers that they, and only they know about. The emailer doesn’t exactly make this claim, but surely implies it. I must give them credit where credit is due–they provide a list of career resources that open up job search tips that are indeed helpful, if not the exclusive knowledge domain of this company.
I’m as willing as the next dinosaur to check out the “next best thing” and try to keep up with relevant trends. But if we need help creating excellent resumes (and let’s face it folks, 9/10 of us really do), what the heck kind of videos are we apt to make? We could end up startling the viewer with a nightmare of clownish grins and sub-par lighting that adds ten years to our faces, not to mention ten pounds to our bodies. If you ever wonder why on-air personalities and Hollywood writers get paid so much, try to make your own video that actually makes you look and sound really good. If you even consider doing this, as in any act of risky self-revelation, please seek professional help.